This blog may contain not-so-strong languages and slightly strong ecchi pictures. Please proceed with caution.

Sunday, 29 January 2017

2017 Seollal Special: Special Address from Chaos Queen

Dear my fellow Koreans, 

The time has come for us to force our disgraced president, Park Geun-hye to step down as the president of the Republic of Korea. In the recent four years, her administration marred with corruptions which was wrought by her confidante, Choi Soon-sil and her cronies. We had it enough. For your information, I was working with her during the Presidential Election. After she sworn in the office on February 2013, she was drastically changed where she favoured her best friend, Choi Soon-sil instead of ME. I was always watching her every single move on how she provides the solutions to curb any issues marred in my adopted country. However, her actions made the citizens and government officials turned sour at instant.

First of all, Choi Soon-sil interfering state affairs by receiving state affairs and setting up national policy. I heard that she made a speech draft for every major presidential speeches, including the Dresden Address. It looks good at the first time, but the president's best-friend made this up. You must think that President Park Geun-hye failed in composing speech in Korean. F grade? You bet it. For your information, every presidential address is considered as the biggest Government Secret. Leaking the secret files will be prosecuted with harsher penalty because the enemy, probably to say North Korea; will take advantage of our country's weaknesses.

Next, the confidante and her cronies hired and fired the personnel who worked either in government and private sectors. Remember Yoo Jin-ryong and Hwang Kyo-ahn? They are the government high officials who once removed from Park Geun-hye's cabinet. Fortunately for Hwang Kyo-ahn, he was reappointed as Prime Minister and Acting President of the Greater Han Republic after Park Geun-hye was impeached by the National Assembly. Looks like a small sweet revenge, isn't it?

I heard that Choi and her cronies involved themselves in a number of appointments. The most significant one appears to be Jeon Dae-ju, ambassador for Vietnam. In Korea, ambassador positions are given almost exclusively to those who worked for the Ministry of Foreign Affairs for a very long time after passing the very difficult civil service exam. Jeon, however, was a businessman and had no government experience at all. Choi Soon-sil was also involved in appointing the head of the Korean Cultural Center in New York and Paris, as well as the head of the Korea Creative Content Agency or KOCCA. For those who watched a Korean band at SXSW should be familiar with KOCCA—that is the agency that is in charge of sending the musicians to Austin, Texas.


The high-profiled figure skater, Kim Yuna has been threatened to not receive the most distinguished award in Korean Sport which is 2015 Sportsman of the Year Award from Korean Sport & Olympic Committee after rejected any sponsorship that related to confidante. The only reason for this issue is she refused callisthenics program sponsored by Choi Soon-sil’s crony, Cha Eun-taek. Rejecting the sponsorship will freeze out of government awards and subsidies. With this, the preparation for the Winter Olympics at Pyeongchang in 2018 stalled because of Choi's monstrosity. The Korean Chaebols are threatened as well by the confidante. Companies that related to Hanjin Group such as Hanjin Shipping and Korean Air and Cheil Jedang-based CJ E&M are in danger because of Choi Soon-sil who meddling these companies.

We have a year remaining for the 2018 Pyeongchang Winter Olympic Games. However, in 2016, Choi and her cronies ensured that the Olympics would please Park Geun-hye’s personal sensibilities. Although Pyeongchang’s mascot was set as a tiger and a bear, Minister of Culture, Sports and Tourism Kim Jong-deok, also Choi’s crony, insisted that the mascot should be changed to a Jindo dog, Park Geun-hye’s pet. This forced the Organisation Committee Chair Cho Yang-ho to make an emergency trip to the International Olympics Committee to change the mascot. Unfortunately, the IOC refused the change, apparently because Koreans eat dogs. Well, this is a bitter truth about us as Koreans. Cho’s failure to change the mascot, as well as his tendency to require strict compliance with the bidding rules for the Olympics-related contracts, made him a thorn on Choi Soon-sil’s side. Eventually, Minister of Culture, Sports and Tourism, Kim Jong-deok forced Cho to resign from being the chairman of the Organisation Committee. 

My fellow Koreans, 

Majority of us are fed up with Park Geun-hye's maladministration. Not only for the working class, but the high school students and senior-citizens who despised her included as well. Look what she has done. Hanjin Shipping went bankrupt, allowing her confidante - Choi Soon-sil to meddle in Government and Private sectors’ affairs, harassment on high-profiled celebrities, chaebols and social medias and siphoning national revenues. 

Park Geun-hye’s drug habit may yet resolve the biggest mystery of her administration—what was she doing during the Sewol ferry disaster, one of the greatest man-made disasters in Korea in the last several decades? The news that Sewol-ho was sinking broke around 9 a.m. on April 16th 2014, and the Blue House received a report of it by 10 a.m. But Park Geun-hye did not appear in public until after 5 p.m., when she appeared at the disaster response center. The “missing seven hours” by Park Geun-hye has been this administration’s greatest controversy, as the Blue House steadfastly refused for more than two years to disclose what Park Geun-hye was doing for hours while 300 school children from Danwon High School were drowning on live television. Some fishermen at Jindo were willing to save the high school students. However, their efforts were hampered by Korean Coast Guard where this agency ordered the fishermen to keep out from the wrecked Sewol-ho.

It's been four years the Koihime Musou Girls resided in the land of morning calm under Park Geun-hye's rule. We're being remarkably composed throughout the chaos. But, the citizen's anger peaked up to the boiling point because of many corruption allegations within Government Sectors and Chaebols. Our time has come to demand the Constitutional Court to expel Park Geun-hye from the Blue House! We will take our risk being busted by Police Officers and upholding the rights of the Democratic Korean Citizens!

Heavens! Behold! I, Cho Hwa-rim, pray that I can carry out Heaven’s Master Plan. Please watch over me as I vanquish my former boss, Park Geun-hye who was impeached by the National Assembly and look after the Greater Han Republic after this peaceful revolution. O Lord who art in Heaven, please give me strength and intelligence to make sure that scoundrel stripped from her post as the President of the Republic of Korea. As the Noble-minded Koreans backed me up in toppling her, so help us God!